


soft kisses

by plainlily



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Angst, Emotional Manipulation, Implied Sexual Content, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Non-Graphic Violence, Physical Abuse, Religion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-11-16
Packaged: 2019-07-19 00:07:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,620
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16129499
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plainlily/pseuds/plainlily
Summary: they still kiss, if not as often.it was soft, before. gentle.not so much, anymore





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> please note the tags.

"it's not personal," mark says. donghyuck understands. really.

mark doesn't want them to come out. he's afraid, he says. he says that it will make it too real, and he doesn't want God to hate him. donghyuck doesn't really know how the two are related, but it's fine.

it's not personal.

it's not personal, but it's hard for donghyuck not to take it personally when mark starts pushing him away at every opportunity, both physically and emotionally. mostly physically.

and it's one thing when it's him rejecting donghyuck's pda in front of the other nct members, ducking away from it playfully. it's another when donghyuck tries to cuddle up to mark on the couch of an empty dorm and gets a harsh shove for his efforts, one that nearly sends donghyuck to the ground. he looks over at mark, shocked, and mark just coughs awkwardly.

"i'm sor- i just. i'm not in the mood, hyuck. long day." he won't meet donghyuck's eyes.

"okay," is all donghyuck says. mark clearly needs some space, and that's fine.

except later that night, mark sneaks into donghyuck's bed, wraps his arms around him and nuzzles into his chest, sighing, and clearly not needing space. donghyuck's heart jumps, and he can't do anything but blink into the darkness, hopelessly confused.

he wakes up to cold emptiness.

 

 

 

_(july)_

 

they still kiss, if not as often. tucked away in corners of the dorm, in their rooms when the hyungs are out.

it was soft, before. gentle.

not so much, anymore.

mark kisses him _hard_ , now. pressing, pressing, teeth nipping and biting, tongue pushing, lips sucking just a bit too harshly, or a lot-

"agh!" donghyuck hisses in pain, pulls away. mark tries to follow him with his mouth, and donghyuck has to place his hands on mark's shoulders to stop him.

"can you- mark, i think i'm bleeding." he swipes his tongue along his lower lip and sure enough, it tastes of metal.

"sorry," mark says, breathing hard. donghyuck frowns. mark blinks, seems to come back to himself a little, asks "are you okay?" to donghyuck while bringing a thumb up to nudge donghyuck's swollen lip.

"are _you_ okay?" donghyuck snaps. "you've been- _weird_ , for weeks now."

mark stiffens at the question. "i'm fine," he mutters. "just a little, pent up, i guess," he shrugs and gives donghyuck a forced smile.

"what about?" donghyuck asks. "you should talk to someone about these things, you know."

"it's- nothing, hyuck! don't worry about it," another plastic smile.

donghyuck worries even more.

 

 

 

it's an accident, that donghyuck hears it. mark is late for dinner, donghyuck is hovering by the door to his room, ready to knock, and mark's voice floats out through the crack where the door is slightly open.

just above a whisper, saying "i'm trying, God. i don't want to feel this way, i know it's wrong. i- i'm sorry... please help me... help me not love him."

it's a broken prayer.

donghyuck's heart sinks so far down into his stomach he feels sick. he turns away from the door, biting against a sob.

mark is late for dinner.

donghyuck is absent with an upset stomach.

 

 

 

he expects mark to break up with him within days. instead, mark holds him closer again, tighter. too tight.

one morning, a hand on donghyuck's hip grips harshly enough that a bruise forms by afternoon. mark's hugs all feel crushing, suffocating.

when they're out with the others, their physical banter turns into pushes, pinches, jabs from mark that _hurt_ , that feel- _mean_. donghyuck winces, whines, and ducks but it does nothing to deter mark.

mark's kisses have gotten softer, though, so at least there's that. donghyuck is grateful.

 

 

 

"haechan-hyung?"

jisung's voice is small and quiet normally, even more so as he addresses donghyuck after a dream practice one day.

donghyuck tilts his head at the younger questioningly as he gathers his things. mark has already run off for some studio session or another and the other members are fooling around on the other side of the practice room. jisung glances behind himself at them, then looks back at donghyuck, his expression hesitant.

"i was just wondering- um. you have-," jisung blows out a breath and shakes his head, seeming annoyed by his own inarticulacy. donghyuck nearly laughs at him, a giggle forming in his throat before it dies at jisung's next words, at the question, "how did you get that bruise on your thigh?"

donghyuck flounders, "oh! um, i think it's from wrestling with mark yesterday, haha."  
it's only half a lie. it did happen yesterday.

jisung squints at donghyuck. "looks weird for a wrestling bruise," he says almost tonelessly.

and it does, just a bit too far inside the middle of donghyuck's left thigh, and a bit too long to be from an elbow or knee.

(a tv remote _slammed_ into it, eliciting a squeak of pain and a jump of shock from being hit so hard unexpectedly and so close to the groin. he slapped mark weakly for it, gritting his teeth against a curse as mark laughed it off and settled into donghyuck's side. he wouldn't cause a scene there, on the couch surrounded by the other hyungs on a night in. he wouldn't cause one later either.)

donghyuck shrugs at jisung. "it's just me and mark," he says. "dont worry about it."

and he doesn't know who he's trying to convince at this point, only knows that when jisung drops it, a panicky, shaken feeling stays in donghyuck's chest.

he must learn how to lie better.

 

 

 

he does, almost too easily. but anyways, it's not quite lying, when it's not like mark actually hits him. and in fact, their kisses are softer than ever these days.

 

 

 

 

 

_(august)_

  
the first time mark actually hits him, donghyuck doesn't cry. his cheek is smarting but his mind feels like it's full of static, buzzing blankly.

mark cries instead.

the words of a forgotten argument are still hanging in the air, where they were broken by the sharp sound of mark's hand meeting donghyuck's face. mark's arms are holding donghyuck too tightly again and he's full sobbing into donghyuck's shoulder as they stand together in a dimly lit dorm. mark bites down hard to muffle the sounds. it's two a.m..

it's two a.m.. donghyuck's cheek is smarting and his shoulder is bleeding now and he thinks through the fuzziness that mark is probably crying for the both of them.

he wonders vaguely if God ever hated them. if He hates them now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you are in a rough situation, please reach out. my intent is not to romanticize or say that this behavior is okay. national domestic violence hotline: 1−800−799−7233.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's not terribly relevant, but mark and hyuck are out to the group, just not to the public/company/their families. tags have been added, please note them.

_(august)_

 

things don't get better. but then, they don't get worse either. donghyuck swears they don't. mark doesn't even hit him in the face again. (the first time had left a red kind of welt on donghyuck's jaw that he had to get up at five a.m. to carefully cover up with concealer for a week straight.)

donghyuck mostly has bruises on his ribs now, but that's normal. they're darker now, hurt more, pull painfully when he dances or twists in certain ways, but sometimes on those rare nights they find themselves in the same bed, mark will tug up his shirt and places featherlight kisses on the discolored skin, gently, lovingly.

donghyuck knows mark still loves him. that's enough. the others, they- they wouldn't understand.

 

 

 

"hyuck, baby," mark says between the soft, wet kisses he's placing on donghyuck's collar.

"mm?" donghyuck hums. they're hiding in one of the dorm bathrooms, as they're barely ever catching spare moments together during the day, between dream promotions and 127 practices.

mark starts sucking and nibbling at donghyuck's skin, clearly intent on creating a hickey and donghyuck doesn't have the heart to pull him away, to tell him no.

mark pauses his actions for a moment, speaking into donghyuck's chest when he says, "i need you to do something for me."

 

 

 

"donghyuckie, what's that on your neck?" jaemin's question is too loud for donghyuck's taste, even though he knows no one is really paying attention. the dressing room they're sat in is hectic, everyone scattered and occupied with more important things than the deep purple blemish on donghyuck's neck, right where it meets his shoulder. everyone except jaemin, apparently. donghyuck pulls his shirt collar up self-consciously, wishing mark would hurry back from the restroom and help by deflecting like he always does.

"none of your business," he says shortly. before he can stop him, jaemin reaches over and pulls his shirt away again. he drops it quickly, however, hissing as if he's been burned. the teasing look he was wearing is now completely gone.

"that looks _painful_ , hyuck, what does mark think he's doing, trying to suck your blood?"

"no!" donghyuck says defensively. after all, he didnt even bleed this time. "stop prying. and stop calling me that."

jaemin's face falls even further. it looks wrong. why does this feel so wrong? "what did you just say?"

"only mark can call me that." donghyuck says quietly. he looks down to avoid meeting jaemin's eyes, heart racing. "you guys can only call me haechan."

"says who?" jaemin demands. "says mark?"

"yes," donghyuck says, unable to help it. "and- and me," he tacks on pathetically, unconvincingly. he feels more than hears the derisiveness in jaemin's responding scoff.

mark asked him to do this. to let mark have something of his own to call donghyuck. but that doesn't mean donghyuck isn't doing it for himself, too. it'll make mark happy. all he wants is for mark to be happy.

"fine, _haechan_ ," jaemin sneers, getting up from his chair. "let me know when mark decides you can be your own person again, why don't you."

and that's not fair, donghyuck thinks, swallowing past a lump in his throat. not any of it.

 

 

 

"i need you to do something else."

"i don't know, mark."

"... for me?"

 

 

 

weeks pass.

mark starts to spend more time praying, more time asking things of donghyuck, and donghyuck spends more time indulging him, following him, even when he doesn't quite know why.

he wears less makeup, because mark asks him to. he doesn't feel as confident anymore, as comfortable with himself.

he loses ten pounds, because mark asks him to. he starts getting breathless at dance practice more easily.

he stops visiting the dream dorm as often, because mark asks him to. he hears through the grapevine that jisung has started having nightmares.

he's sure it's all unrelated.

 

 

 

things don't get worse, until they do, until all donghyuck feels he can do is wait for everything to fall apart.

 

 

 

 _(a thursday, late september)_  

 

they're never really good anymore, but there are times when they're _better_ , and although donghyuck feels the tiniest bit of shame admitting it, that's usually when they're in bed.

mark has once again taken the trouble of making sure his dorm room was empty. he's taken the trouble of touching donghyuck so softly and intimately that donghyuck has melted right into the mattress. all gentle hands, lips, fingers, caressing, kissing, pressing over and into donghyuck. he feels full, almost safe, almost happy, with mark like this.

then mark strikes him, open palmed again, but closer to the center of donghyuck's face than the first time, hard enough that blood pools in donghyuck's mouth.

something in donghyuck breaks for good.

the next few moments are a blur, everything in donghyuck screaming get away, away, away. he shoves mark aside and jumps off of the bed, fumbles along the floor for the sleep pants mark had pulled off him maybe twenty minutes ago. he gasps, trying to catch his breath in between sobs as he clothes himself.

"fuck! fuck, hyuck, donghyuckie, i'm sorry, i'm so so sorry, i won't- i won't do it again, please don't cry, stop crying-" mark's voice is quiet and desperate as he pleads, as though tears aren't glittering his eyes as well.

"shut up!" donghyuck yells, almost shrill. he doesn't care that it's too loud. "you said that last time- i don't- i don't know why i'm still here-"

"you love me," mark says, and God, it hurts to hear out loud how stupid donghyuck is, has been, "and i love you-"

"you _don't_!" donghyuck takes in a deep breath, suddenly ready to let everything out, ready to scream at mark how he doesn't make sense, and whatever God he speaks to doesn't either, because this isn't, can't be, _love_.

and that's when the room door creaks open.

taeyong stands frozen in the doorway, eyes wide as he takes in the scene. donghyuck's heart drops to his feet when he realizes that he's still shirtless, the bruises littering his torso on full display and in various stages of healing, one side of his face swollen and blood dripping out of the corner of his mouth, he realizes how this looks.

how this makes mark look. mark, who is sitting just as half-naked, but clearly perfectly unharmed. not a scratch on his smooth pale skin or face.

"donghyuck," taeyong grits out, expression stormy. donghyuck knows his ire is not directed at him, yet his pulse still quickens.

"tell me," taeyong stops to take a breath, "please tell me this isn't what it looks like."

donghyuck breaks even further.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> national domestic violence hotline: 1−800−799−7233.


	3. Chapter 3

donghyuck was too beautiful. mark loved him so much. too much, much too much for a boy to love another boy. it was  _wrong_ \- the way he felt so right with donghyuck also made him feel too far from God.

mark thought that maybe, if donghyuck was a little less pretty, a little less bright, mark could fall out of love with him. that if he could erase the strong, loud, confident, beautiful boy he fell in love with, he could get a shot at heaven.

so he tried to do that. and tried, and tried, and tried, and hyuck did seem to break, just that little bit, but mark loved him all the same, he swears it.

so maybe it didn’t work, but who could blame him for trying to get into heaven?

this isn’t his fault.

why does he feel so guilty?

 

 

 

_(thursday)_

 

it’s not his fault, but when the door creaks open and taeyong asks if it’s what it looks like, mark feels the need to defend himself.

“no- hyung-”

“i didn’t. ask you. mark lee.” mark’s blood runs cold at taeyong’s tone. never, in all of the years he’s known the older male, has mark heard him sound like that, let alone towards  _him_.

donghyuck is still crying. and he still looks beautiful. (it makes mark want to hit something). he’s silent except for some small sniffs and hiccups.

“hyuck-”

“be quiet, mark!” taeyong snaps. he steps fully into the room, the door clicking shut behind him as he raises an accusing finger at mark. “don’t think i won’t kick you out of this whole damn building right now, because i will!”

his words make anger rise quickly in mark. “what are you talking about, i haven’t done anything wrong!” and he hasn’t. all he’s done is love God, and donghyuck, in his own way. he glares at taeyong, challenging, ignoring the heavy feeling in his gut telling him not to.

“are you fucking kiddi-”

“don’t curse at him,” hyuck says, tiny. taeyong stops, shifting his gaze from mark to look at him incredulously.

“donghyuckie,” he says carefully. “you don’t have to defend him. he  _hit_ you.”

hyuck shakes his head and mark’s heart stutters.

“he didn’t mean it.”

 

 

 

hyuck won’t talk anymore, but taeyong takes him out of the room. mark immediately aches with how much he misses him. he aches with the confusion crowding his head, that maybe- maybe his faith has led him astray. he curls up, cold without donghyuck’s warmth.

he doesn’t sleep. 

(he can hear donghyuck crying two rooms over.)

 

 

 

“ _he didn’t mean it_.”

only, what if he did?

 

 

 

_(friday)_

 

mark has no idea how much anyone knows, but someone makes johnny talk to him fairly early the next morning. he’s aware that he looks a right mess, his hair uncombed, in dirty, rumpled pajamas, and deep dark rings under his eyes. he feels even worse than he looks.

johnny doesn’t look as though he sympathizes.

“you’re lucky you don’t have any schedules today,” he says in a clipped tone, walking into mark’s room. doyoung hasn’t texted to ask to come back yet, so johnny perches himself on doyoung’s bed and stares across at mark.

“i know,” mark says, looking at his hands. “how is he?”

johnny’s gaze becomes even more piercing, his mouth thinning.

“well. you hit him.”

mark bursts into tears.

 

 

 

“ _he_ hit  _you_.”

“ _he didn’t mean it_.”

no, he didn’t mean it, please God, no.

 

 

 

the entire dorms, they know, they  _know_ what he did. they don’t let mark see donghyuck all day. they take turns keeping watch, bringing him minimal food and water and heavy glares.

“please- i need- i need to see him, please hyungs i’m so sorry, God, i’m sorry, please,” his throat burns, scratched raw by his own sobs and yells. his hands are bruised from pounding the door for hours. he deserves the pain.

he deserves much worse.

 

 

 

doyoung comes back to the room late in the evening, sits in the dark exactly where johnny had sat in the daylight. he and mark don’t speak for ten minutes, then,

“i can’t believe you hurt hyuckie like that, mark,” doyoung says it quietly, almost like it’s his own secret, his own shame.

“haechan,” mark corrects hollowly, unthinkingly, from where he’s sat back against his headboard.

in a second, doyoung crosses the room and leans down to cuff him in the neck,  _hard_ , hard enough to knock mark onto his side. marks coughs, fresh tears spilling from his eyes again. he doesn’t bother to sit back up.

“don’t you  _ever_ pull that shit again, lee minhyung,” doyoung spits as he stands up straight. “you’re forgetting that i’m not taeyong.”

he goes back to his side of the room. the room feels ten degrees colder and the rest of the night is spent in frigid silence.

 

 

 

(mark can’t hear donghyuck crying anymore.

he cries for the both of them.)

 

 

 

 

 

he’s ruined everything.

he didn’t mean to.

he didn’t mean it.

 

 

 


	4. interlude i

 

 

 

 

 

_(saturday)_

 

mark wakes up hurting. it’s early, about six a.m., and his eyes are dry and irritated. his throat is sore and swollen. his neck aches slightly where doyoung struck him.

his knuckles are covered in purple and red.

he looks at them, at his hands, squinting in the dim, bluish morning light coming through the window. he thinks about how they don’t look at all like the bruises he put on donghyuck. his skin is paler than hyuck’s; his bruises look angry. hyuck glows soft gold; he bruises softly and prettily.

mark, only days ago, used to be fascinated with the blooming colors on donghyuck’s skin whenever he hurt him. at first he hated them, and then he was in love with them, with how everything about them made hyuck _his_.

now, thinking about them makes bile rise in his throat, and it’s six a.m., and mark is running clumsily down the dorm halls to be desperately, horribly sick in the toilet.

 

 

 

 

 

_donghyuck shakes his head. he’s panicking. taeyong is so, so angry. donghyuck, he- he doesn’t know what he wanted, but it wasn’t this, it wasn’t him and the world against mark. he can’t just let mark fall like this, he can’t let taeyong, or anyone, or everyone, think that it’s all mark’s fault._

_(though, isn’t it?)_

_“he didn’t mean it.”_

_(though, didn’t he?)_

 

_in the end, everyone thinks it’s mark’s fault, anyways._

_and by then donghyuck starts to almost miss the pain. he starts to miss mark._

_he’s so pathetic._

 

 

 

 

 

_(saturday)_

 

donghyuck wakes up hurting, and missing mark.

 

 

 


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's going to continue to get worse before it gets better. warning that some of the content/dialogue in this chapter may be triggering. take care of yourselves and reach out if you are hurting. <3
> 
> (ps. please don't hate doyoung or mark.)

 

 

 

_(saturday, 00:03 KST)_

 

“i’m not sure if he even knows that what he did was wrong.” johnny says to the glass of water sitting on the coffee table in front of him. it’s collecting condensation, and his throat is dry, but if he picks it up his hands may shake. he hasn’t slept properly in two full days. it feels like a week since he spoke to mark, but it was only this morning, and the conversation was incredibly uninformative, consisting mostly of mark shouting denials through tears.

 

 

_  
“i didn’t mean to, hyung you have to believe me-!”_

_“that wasn’t- an_ accident _, mark, please, stop lying, just tell me why -”_

 _“i’m_ not _! please, please, i swear i didn’t mean it, i didn’t, i didn’t ...”_

 

 

 

“i- yeah,” taeyong blows out a sigh. “that might be what scares me the most,” he says, so quietly johnny can barely hear it, even in the dead midnight silence of the dorm living room. taeyong, like johnny, has dark circles under his eyes that weren’t there last week, but he looks even more tired, almost aged. johnny hurts for him. he hurts for everyone lately, in this makeshift “home” they’ve made, where they were all supposed to feel safe. where they’re all hurting now.

 

(taeil hasn’t said a word since the situation arose. yuta has said too many.)

 

“...how’s hyuck doing?” he asks, though he doesn’t really want to know, doesn’t really want to keep accepting that this nightmare is real.

“crying. he wants to see mark. he’ll tire himself out, though.”

johnny bites his lip. “maybe we should’ve gone to the company about this, taeyong. to the real adults. or at least a manager-”

“no!” taeyong sits up straight, before slumping back into the couch only seconds later. “no, who- who knows what they’ll do to them- they’re just kids- they made mistakes-”

“you mean, _mark_ made mistakes.” johnny says bitterly.

taeyong shrugs heavily, like he wishes the action would shift this problem elsewhere.

“don’t be so hard on him. he’s your brother, and there’s more to it. he fears God.”

“yeah.” johnny says, just to say something. he fears God, too. he never wanted to- well.

“he lost weight,” taeyong says, out of nowhere. “haechannie- hyuck. i thought, i thought he _wanted_ to, so i-” he chokes on his words, closes his eyes as tears slip down from under his lashes. “this was last month, and- at the time i _congratulated_ him, but today he told me he only did it because mark called him fat, and told him to lose weight. he said he did it so that mark would keep loving him,” the sentence ends on a quiet sob, taeyong covering his mouth with a hand.

johnny’s mind is rushing, shaken by taeyong’s words. it’s like every time he thinks this can’t get worse, it does. but he- it doesn’t make _sense_ . johnny _knows_ mark, loves him, even with all of this. he _isn’t_ a bad person, johnny knows it with all his heart.

mark may fear God, but he loves so much, and it- it seemed like mark loved donghyuck more than any of it.

maybe the way mark loved donghyuck scared him.

maybe the way taeyong is crying now scares johnny.

just a little.

he pulls taeyong to him anyways, lets him weep against his shoulder. he knows taeyong was stressed even before this, and homesick, and tired. this was the last thing any of them needed.

it’s just that- it’s been a matter of hours since everything started falling apart, and already, they’re all so, so tired.

 

 

 

_(saturday, 05:57 KST)_

 

johnny is awoken by voices in the hallway, speaking harshly and too loud for the time of night, or morning, seeing as the sun is just rising. he groans, running a hand over his face. his neck has a crick from the way he fell asleep against the couch. so much for that, he guesses, though he notices that another member must have sweetly brought down a blanket and tucked it over them sometime during the night. probably sicheng.

taeyong is still deep in slumber against johnny’s side. johnny considers trying to go back to sleep as well, but the voices are only getting louder. he carefully slips his arm out from under taeyong, positions him more comfortably along the cushions, adjusts the blanket and places a soft kiss on his forehead.

he then makes his way to the commotion in the hall, where only one of the lights is on, casting strange shadows. johnny nearly walks straight into doyoung, whose expression is livid, and who is dragging a teary, pathetic-looking mark lee by the ear. he blinks at them, too tired to react properly yet.

“he tried to sneak away,” doyoung hisses, jerking mark in his tight grip, making the boy yelp quietly.

“i didn’t,” mark protests weakly, face contorted in pain, enough so that johnny almost wants to tell doyoung to take it easy. almost. “i was, i got sick, i’m sorry, i’m sorry-”

“i caught him next to jaehyun and donghyuck’s room-”

“yes, but- i wasn’t going to- hyung, please- ow! please stop hurting me,” and fat, real tears are rolling down mark’s cheeks now as he falls apart once more. doyoung scoffs, letting mark go and pushing him towards johnny, who immediately, instinctively, wraps his arms around the crying boy, holds him close to his chest. his brother.

“did donghyuck ever say that to you?” doyoung asks, tilting his head. “did he ever ask you to stop hurting him?” a line. he's crossing it.

“doyoung,” johnny says sharply, as mark begins to tremble violently. “stop it.”

“he deserves it,” is all doyoung says, and he looks angry, yes, but his eyes look a bit... sad. and maybe johnny should go after him when he turns around and storms back down the hall, but he’s busy trying to shush down mark’s crying so that it doesn’t wake taeyong or any of the others.

(johnny is beginning to tire of tears. of everything.)

“i- he did, i didn’t-” mark says after a while, gulping and breathing heavily. johnny’s blood runs cold; he doesn’t have to ask mark to clarify what he means. he already knows.

donghyuck did ask mark to stop. mark didn’t listen.

 

 

every time he thinks this can’t get worse, it does

 

 

 


	6. interlude ii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> timestamps have been added. this is set about a month prior to the last couple of chapters.

 

_ (a tuesday, late august) _

 

“you’re not going to… keep doing this, are you?”

mark stares at donghyuck, cold, and not himself.

_ he’s not himself. _

_ this isn’t love. _

**_shut up!_ **

donghyuck silences that dumb little voice in his head. mark is right in front of him. mark  _ does _ love him, so much. he just, doesn’t know what to do with all that love sometimes, so he says. he says this makes it easier, and so does donghyuck, when he does some of the things mark asks him to do.

and donghyuck gets that, kind of, not really. he gets it, sort of, but-

“it hurts, mark.” his hands flutter about his own torso, not wanting to brush against any tender spots. mark looks down at where donghyuck is gesturing. he frowns slightly.

“i’m sorry, hyuck.”

_ he doesn’t sound all that sorry. _

**_shut up shut up shut up_ **

it’s fine. they’re fine. only, donghyuck had trouble falling asleep the other night, because mark gave him more than one bruise that day, and lying on them does hurt. aches and stings.

(his heart aches too, for some reason. for some reasons.)

 

mark tastes like candy. he must have eaten something sweet before coming down to donghyuck’s room while jaehyun is out with taeyong. his lips feel slightly sticky against donghyuck’s. they pull the tiniest bit as mark repeatedly presses them to donghyuck’s skin.

sticky, sweet,

soft kisses.

 

“does this mean… mark?”

“yes, hyuckie?”

“...will you please stop?”

 

“i… yeah. i think so. maybe.”

  
  
  


 

maybe, sort of, kind of.

not really.

not at all.

 

 

 

 

 


End file.
